He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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