my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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