Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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