I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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