you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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