If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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