One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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