Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
