Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
