Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
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do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
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the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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