so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Randomize