Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Randomize
