i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize