theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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