I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
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