New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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