I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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