Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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