where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
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We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
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Blow job season was short but glorious.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
the raccoons are back...
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