I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Fuck appropriateness.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
