"it" just moved
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
