goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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