Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
