So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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