So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
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she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
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I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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