I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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