$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize