Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
They have beer where we have blood.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
