so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
You were trust falling into bushes
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
