u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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