3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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