I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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