There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
