I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Even my vagina gasped.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
All I want is dick and wine.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
