Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
