He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
do nipples grow back?
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