so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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