Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
