i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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