I am spending my child support on dildos
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar