4 words: hood of his car
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
