If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
