i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
