fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
