Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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