This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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