it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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