you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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