Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Randomize
