I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
